The Coldplay Conundrum

Anyone who knows me well knows that my music tastes are and have always been all over the spectrum. From Pantera to Tori Amos, from Snoop Dogg to NOFX, from Depeche Mode to Eric Clapton, from 311 to Eminem to Beethoven to Bauhaus to John Lennon....I'm sure you get the point. I'll listen to almost anything. Almost anything - Audioslave makes my ears bleed.

A few short years ago, I had Coldplay in my "makes my ears bleed, avoid at all costs" file along with Audioslave, Limp Bizkit, and what I consider to be the worst 3 songs in the world: that awful, awful song "Blinded By the Light" by Manfred Mann, "Carry On My Wayward Son" by Kansas, and "Tears of a Clown" by Smokey Robinson. I could probably do an entire post on just those 3 songs. And maybe I will at some point. But seriously, just thinking about all 3 songs at the same time is making my head want to explode, so back to the story at hand.

I simply could not stand Coldplay when I first heard them, and I wanted nothing more than for Chris Martin to shut the fuck up. I'd make a face every time my sister would play one of their songs. I'd change the radio station (this was back when I was still listening to radio) the minute I heard the opening bars of "Yellow." Then, "Clocks" and "The Scientist." I really couldn't stand them at all. And so, Coldplay was relegated to the "please don't make me listen to this" file and put away.

Here and there over the years I would hear Coldplay-related news, like the whole Chris Martin/Gwyneth Paltrow thing, and just couldn't really make myself care. Chris Martin just seemed like such a pompous fuck, which incidentally is also how I feel about Bono, if anyone's keeping score. And so, when I saw the 420 episode of Family Guy, when Peter's too baked to set up a cutaway and just lists a bunch of celebrities he doesn't like, I laughed really hard. Chris Martin, Chris Martin again, Chris Martin's parents...and then at the end, Chris Martin's ancestors. Hilarious. See below (this was the best quality of this clip I could find).



Anyway, Coldplay fell completely off my radar, because really, why wouldn't they? Fast forward to 2010. I'm watching So You Think You Can Dance (don't judge, it entertains me), and I hear this song that I immediately fall in love with. I look down at the bottom of the screen at it says "Viva La Vida" - Coldplay. Picture my stunned face. Thought process: "I'm sorry, what? I like a Coldplay song? And not only like, but absolutely love love love it? No! No, unacceptable." So after the episode is over, I download the song. And I still love it. Thought process: "Oh, crap. After all the shit I gave Sarah for liking Coldplay....well, she just can't know, that's all." I swore Josh to secrecy and he never said a word. By the way, the song was actually released in 2008, which just proves how off my radar Coldplay really was.



Seriously, I could not get enough of this song. Ok, now fast forward another year to 2011 and another season of So You Think You Can Dance. One couple does a beautiful dance to a really beautiful song. I look down at the bottom of the screen, and there it is. "Fix You" - Coldplay. Thought process: "Goddammit. This cannot be happening." But it was indeed happening. I had fallen in love with not one, but two Coldplay songs.



Beautiful, right? This one was released in 2005, and So You Think You Can Dance turned me on to it in 2011. At some point during that year, I came clean to my sister about how much I adored "Viva La Vida." I think I actually started the conversation with something like "Don't make fun of me, but..." And she actually didn't, she just agreed that it was an amazing song and she loved it to. I love my sister.

Now, the latest. Last night I was watching American Idol.  I know you want to judge that, and I just don't care. Phillip Phillips is fucking awesome. That is all.
Anyway, Coldplay performed last night, in honor of it being "BritPop" week. They performed 2 songs. The first was "Paradise" and holy shit I loved it. LOVED it in capital letters. Here's the video.




Ok, the video's freaking weird, and for some reason the band is dressed like elephants, but man do I love that song. A whole lot. And then, Coldplay performed the song "Every Teardrop is a Waterfall." Yep, Idol gave them two performances. Because they're Coldplay, obviously, and Idol was clearly kissing their asses big time. And guess what? I loved that song too. I love "Paradise" more, but still. -sigh-




Turns out these two songs are from their most recent album, so apparently I am now up to date on Coldplay, which is something I never thought I'd say. I have resigned myself to the fact that I love the songs above, and that it's entirely possible that I may like some of their future songs. However, I still absolutely cannot stand their earlier songs, stated at the beginning of the post. "Clocks?" Puke.

So, I guess I can officially say that I am a fan of the "later" Coldplay. I'm owning it. They've been added to my iTunes, Pandora, and Spotify playlists. Well played, Coldplay, well played.